Here’s the routine for confident reception desk interactions

Lucy Kellaway as always makes some telling and humorous points about reception area etiquette (“Your rudeness in reception may be used against you“, FT 29/3/15). http://on.ft.com/1H2R6I2

I visit numerous waiting rooms every week. One area where people often miscue at the reception desk is in saying their name first and then the name of the person they’re meeting with. This will often cause the receptionist to ask for their name again.

For a seamless, time-saving, reception-desk interaction:

1. Say the name of the person you’re meeting with (ie. start with known information).

2. Then say your name.

3. Then take a name badge/register.

If you subscribe to the view that ‘Whatever can be seen or heard, will be seen or heard, and will form an impression’, and that you should maximise the number of positive impressions you leave – your reception desk etiquette does matter, and will contribute to other people’s perceptions of you.

Learn from IKEA’S simplicity virture

One of IKEA’s propositions of doing business, coined by its founder is: Simplicity is a virtue*. Complicated rules can paralyse. Planning is necessary but it can become red tape. Exaggerated planning can be fatal. Let simplicity and commonsense guide you.Continue reading

What moving toward an audience increases your confidence

We may think that fear works in the following way: 1. I feel fear. 2. I run away. In practice it is the opposite.

Chris Walsh in his book Cowardice, elaborates on the fear response, “Generations of Psych 101 students have been given this shorthand for this theory of emotion: “I run, therefore I fear”. It’s hard for them to wrap their heads around this theory, because it runs counter to “common sense” and what feels like personal experience.

After one beholds a frightening object, one’s body responds with an elevated heartbeat or by automatically performing some action: this bodily response is then interpreted by the mind as fear.

Amborse Bierce defined a coward as “one who, in a time of perilous emergency, thinks with his legs.”

The take-away point for you from the above is that when you are doing a stand-up presentation, move closer to the audience, versus moving back (ie, ‘moving backward with your legs’). Once you move closer to the audience plant your feet and speak. As the presentation continues you can move. But after you move – stop, plant your feet again and speak from that spot for a time, as so on.

By moving closer to the audience you will feel more confident and the audience will perceive you as more confident (Obviously you can move too close to the audience and I’m not suggesting this).

Your Call to action/How to apply for this post: In the next seven days, when you feel anxiety in a business pitch, presentation or chance encounter, move toward the person(s). Reflect on how this movement affects your emotions.

Learn why telling the truth is not a tactic

“I think this is very important, number nine, is to be honest. This is a tactical approach these days.

People always say, “I love that thing you’ve got where you just say whatever’s on your mind. You just come right out with it. It’s like, you know, the truth.” It’s like, well, that’s not really a tactic. That’s a way of living. That’s a way of being.

This is just one of the pithy quotes from David Carr’s commencement address to the UC Berkeley School of Journalism in 2014. Here’s the link to the video and transcript.
http://bit.ly/1yTF77N

Carr’s comment reminded me of a quote from John Gardner: “Pity the leader caught between unloving critics and uncritical lovers.”
In effect, what we should seek out in our lives are ‘loving critics’. The people who care about our welfare and support us, as well as giving us unvarnished feedback.

People pay me to be their loving critic – to give them honest feedback that is couched with sensitivity – about how they pitch themselves and their ideas, about their body language, their voice, the structure of their messages and how they listen and speak under pressure.

Other quotations from Carr’s speech that resonated with me were:
“The most interesting thing in the world is something I don’t know.”
“If you’re scared and courageous at the same time you’ll probably do great things.”
“Don’t be a bystander in your own life.”

Your Call to action/How to apply for this post: In the next seven day seek out a loving critic, or be a loving critic for someone. For specific guidelines on how to do this please email me at michael@kellyspeech.com.au

How to assume the buyer mentality when you’re with a prospect

Yesterday I conducted a workshop entitled: ‘Listen and speak under pressure in job interviews’. In a discussion about the value of one’s worth I shared this message:

“When I have a meeting with a prospective client, I enter that meeting with the ‘buyer’ mindset versus that of the ‘seller’. That is, my mindset is, that I have a valuable service offering, and the prospective client needs to convince me that they are the right type of client, for me to ‘buy’ them to be one of my clients.”

With this mindset and my interaction style and manner in the meeting, the aim is not to be an ‘aggressive buyer’. Rather it is to present a secure, confident affect, sourced from an honest reflection, over time, of the worth of my services.

In the workshop, I shared with participants that when they enter into a job interview, that they too act as the ‘buyer’ of the organisation (versus a needy job seeker). That they present themselves as having a valuable contribution to offer for the right organisation.

Your Call to action/How to apply for this post: In the next seven days, set aside time to honestly reflect on the your worth in the marketplace. In your interactions, meetings, interviews, business pitches etc. keep that worth in mind.

p.s. Last week I presented a ‘Speaking with Impact’ workshop at the ACS (Australian Computer Society) Future Leaders Institute. The five day Institute, directed by former ACS President Nick Tate, gave delegates a vast array of content and process to help them on their leadership journey. Peppers at Salt Village, in Kingcliff, NSW was a great venue for the Institute.

What a schema is and why top performers use them

Top executives I interact with have well developed Schemas for the variety of interactions, encounters, meetings and presentations that are involved in. Below is a description of schemas and how they can used:
• A schema is a pattern of thought that organizes experience.
• In our personal lives, for example, we have schemas for how to behave at a barbecue or at a parent-teacher meeting (eg, at a parent-teacher meeting, we know it usually will be a short meeting; We may sit at/near the child’s desk; The teacher talks about our child; We ask questions; At the end of the meeting we stand and take our leave).
• In business life, we have schemas for the varying types of interactions, encounters, meetings and presentations we’re involved in.

• Having clear schemas – in advance – for any type of interaction, encounter, meeting and presentation, and being able quickly translate that pattern of thought into behaviour will help you:
– project certainty, presence, poise and inspire others to have confidence in you
– predict the sequence of interplay between people. For example, you’ll be able to predict the type of responses/actions of other people.

• Here is a Recommended Schema Mindset and sample Word and Syntax for a chance encounter with an ‘A’ class executive/prospect etc. you haven’t met before. This interaction might occur in the lobby of an office building. (CAVEAT!: Adapt the below words and syntax to your style, and always practice the technique first in safe interactions.)
1. Schema Mindset:
a. ‘Attention > Reference > 30 seconds’
(That is, get the person’s Attention; Reference whom you are: Ask if the person has 30 seconds)
b. Body movement and speaking cadence: ‘Be quick but don’t hurry”.
(That is: Be definite in your movement toward the person and allow silent pause gaps in your speaking)
c. Manner, gaze and voice: ‘Project energy and certainty’.
(That is, fully face the person; make sure your voice is energetic, is easily heard; hold eye contact and smile).

2. Words and Syntax opening (please adapt wording and syntax to suit your style and always first practice in safe interactions!)
• You say, “ X (P-A-U-S-E) We haven’t met before – I’m Max Kelly, I work for PQR in Wealth Advisory
(P-A-U-S-E) do you have 30 seconds?”

If the person says ‘No’, say, “Fine, I’ll catch you at another time.”

If the person says ‘Yes’ either:
a. Ask a question that taps their insight/or ask for their advice.*
b. Pitch an idea and ask if you could send them an email about it.
c. Ask if you could contact their assistant (use the assistant’s name if you know it) to arrange a meeting.

3. Words and Syntax Open, middle and close
• You say, “ Max (P-A-U-S-E) We haven’t met before – I’m Max Kelly, I work for PQR in Wealth Advisory – do you have 30 seconds?”
• The person says, ‘Sure”
• You say: “You’re obviously a top performer (P-A-U-S-E) . . . What behavior or attitude have you used throughout your career, that’s paid off for you (P-A-U-S-E).and because it’s paid off for you, you continue to use it today? Could you chisel it down to one thing?”
• Once they respond, say thank you and take your leave.

(* Over time consider what thought-provoking questions you could ask senior executives. Insert them in an easily accessed section of your smart phone so you can refer to them at a moment’s notice).

You Call to action/How to apply for this post: Start developing, storing and sharpening the various Schemas that are most important to you in business.

Here a step by step technique to speak like Barack Obama

What if you could have a practical, powerful process to notch-up your speaking impact through the modelling of an expert speaker?

Below is a description on how to do this.

GOAL
To produce a high level speaking performance that approximates the performance level of an expert speaker, while putting your individual ‘stamp’ on the performance.

RATIONALE
By being able to approximate the level of an expert speaker, you’ll upgrade your existing speaking skill. You’ll also have new ‘phrasing repertoires’ to embed into your speaking.

EQUIPMENT Needed
Access to the web
A camera to video record your speaking

THE PROCESS
1. Click on the following link of Barack Obama’s 2008 Grant Park speech: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3K8GWCl7P7U
and Watch starting from ‘Hello Chicago’ at 55 seconds . . . to ‘The United States of America’ at 2:32

2. Take notes on the speech and form the notes into presentation notes/talking points for yourself.

3. Using your notes/points video record your delivery of the opening segment.

4. Playback and watch your recording and compare it to Obama’s.

5. Refine your words, cadence, voice, and body language, and then repeat steps 3, 4 until your performance approximates the expert level of Obama’s performance.

This is a proven process that my executive and business pitch clients have used to improve their speaking and presentation impact.
It’s worth the effort.