A practical email template that will get you authentic feedback

 In Mindset

Recently I asked members of my Mastermind Group* to respond to the following question: “How do I fool myself by holding a perception that is lesser or greater than reality?”

I posed this question (I’m not sure where it comes from) because I know that I have blind spots about how other people perceive me. Knowing how others perceive me and reflecting on their feedback can stop me fooling myself about how I’m coming across.

Here is the text of the email I sent after the a recent Mastermind Group, face to face meeting.

Subject: : thanks in advance/how do I fool myself by holding a perception that is lesser or greater than reality?

“Hi Everyone,

At our last Mastermind meeting I asked Anthony and Joseph to help me out. I asked them to consider the following question about me:

‘How do I fool myself by holding a perception that is lesser or greater than reality?’

and then email me their thoughts. I invite you Don, Peter, Ivan to do the same.

I asked them to be direct as possible.

The reason I asked for this feedback is that I know I have a blank spot about how I come across/am perceived by others. (For example, I may perceive myself as being inspiring where another person might perceive me to be overwhelming). By knowing more about what others perceive about me that will help me understand myself better – and then take action, if warranted, to change how I behave, think etc.

Be assured whatever you say I won’t take it personally. I have the view that all perceptions are valid. (In my workshops with clients one of the Mantras is ‘All feedback is great’). That is, I will consider and reflect what you say but may/may not choose to accept it.  Self-esteem coach Jack Canfield says there can be several versions of the truth and we can choose what versions to accept.

Thanks for considering to do this for me and for any feedback you give.




As of this time only one person has responded to the question. However, I’ve greatly appreciated the candour of the feedback. I’ve been reflecting on it over the past weeks and getting a better insight about how I’m perceived.

Now there are several 360 degree type instruments to get feedback on yourself. However, these tools can be time-consuming and cumbersome. When asked of a person with whom you have a trusted relationship, this ‘how do I fool myself’ question can give you valuable feedback, in a short time-frame.

The ‘how to apply’ for this post: In the next seven days take a risk and send your  variation of the above ‘how do a fool myself’ email to a person whom you trust.

* A Mastermind Group is a group of like-minded people (in my case solo business owners) who meet regularly to help each other in a particular venture or interest.

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